Where did we go wrong???

A few weeks ago I posted something like "thank you Facebook for inspiring me to stop using you and actually call people to really find put how they are."  However, that staement is not 100 % true.  It was a cross between seeing some family that weekend that I had not seen in months, texting with some friends about their lives and how they really were AND Facebook posts I was reading that were driving me crazy.

I mean we all have those friends that do nothing but post pictures, NOT their pictures but internet pics all day long.  Or that friend who sound manic/depressive if you sit down and read their posts one by one in order.  There is also that friend who always sounds so positive but you just talked to them and they are not doing well at all.   No I am saying that everyone is crazy, or hiding something not being real on Social Media, but I am saying social media has taken away (for me) some of the real live connection in a relationship.

We now just go to a website update how we are feeling and push post.  That is enough for us now.  We think "Hey, now everyone knows how I am feeling and I don't need to go deeper or leave anyone out."  We post pictures, check in and even comment on other people's pictures or messages.  But how many of you honestly don't think "WOW, how awesome is that pic I got 50 likes" or "awe I thought that message was funny, no one liked it...oh they must have not seen it."  I have even found my daughter saying how many people have like our xyz.  My mind went crazy when she said that.  I thought to myself what have I come to that my daughter wants to be sure that a certain pic got likes.  

I realized how much I am on Facebook and how often I say "hold on honey let me finish this" or "I totally have to post this on Facebook."  Who the heck do I think I am that I am that important that people are waiting around to see my posts.  Or turn that around and say WHY do people want to see my posts.  Why dont people who want to know how I am doing just call me?  Heck I'd even take an email.

So I have taken myself off Facebook on a daily basis and only allow myself to check, post or comment on Fridays, but not until after my child is fast asleep.  What will I do with my time?  How will I find out how people are doing or where they went?  How will I cope?

1. I will put down my phone and never (almost never) again say hold on honey let me finish this post or message.

2.  I will spend more time with my child, I mean who would have ever guess the changes in my life in just 5 years.  Why miss a single second of bonding time with her.   Before I know it she will be walking out my door to college.

3. I will pick up the phone and call people, even facetime.  Actually find out from their mouths how they are doing.  Maybe even learn a little more that the one post could tell me.  I have a phone with unlimited minutes might as well use them.

4. I will always get updates from that people I see all the time.  Hey did you see so and so said xyz.

5. It's not easy to walk away, but it feels good to me.  

Ok I am not saying that everyone should do this or that anyone uses it like I did, but i am saying when was the last time a Facebook post cried on your shoulders, gave you a hug or opened up their heart to you and let you hear the joy, saddness or emotion the person had from you reading the post.  Where are your relationships?  Are they stronger than ever since facebook?  Are they unsteading because someone read a posts intentions wrong?  Are they weakend by mistrust?  Are they stronger because you found family there?  Could they be stronger if you asked for that persons phone number to talk or met for coffee?

Computers are great and they do amazing things.  Families have been reunited by tons of websites, Facebook included.  Facetimes, tango, Skpe, AIM and all instant messengers are have made communitcation fast, and even more personal than a note.  Bringing two people closer than a phone call by seeing their face.  BUT, how often do you use them now?  Has Facebook became you sole way of communication?  Dont get me wrong I love Facebook for what is can do and has done.   I just miss your voice.

Here's to trying to use my unlimited talk all up!  Talk to you soon.

p.s. Facebook is the only social media site I really used (besides blogging) so that is why it is the focue of this blog...I have nothing against them or all of the other sites like them.